Jewish prayer for the sick and dying: essential, practical guide
jewish prayer for the sick and dying
For many families, jewish prayer for the sick and dying offers a source of comfort, connection, and meaning at moments of worry or loss. Whether you are sitting by a hospital bed, caring for someone at home, or seeking words to say when you cannot be physically present, Jewish tradition provides prayers and practices that can steady the heart and honour the person who is unwell or nearing the end of life.
This guide introduces the essentials of jewish prayer for the sick and dying, explains the most widely used texts, and offers practical advice on how to pray with sensitivity and care. It is written for adults who may not be experts in Hebrew or synagogue customs, and it includes links to trusted resources where you can find full texts and further guidance.
What is jewish prayer for the sick and dying?
In Jewish life, praying for someone who is ill (refu’ah) or approaching death is a way to express love, solidarity, and hope. The core elements of jewish prayer for the sick and dying include requests for healing (such as the Mi Sheberach), reciting Psalms (Tehillim), and sharing end-of-life prayers like the Vidui (a compassionate, optional confessional) and the Shema (the central declaration of faith). These prayers can be said by anyone—family, friends, or clergy—and may be spoken in Hebrew or in heartfelt English.
While there are set texts with deep history, intention (kavannah) matters most. If Hebrew is unfamiliar, you can use transliteration, translation, or simply speak your own words. Many people also add the person’s Hebrew name and their mother’s name (e.g., “Yitzhak ben Sarah”) when praying for healing, though using the person’s everyday name is entirely acceptable if that is what you know.
Core principles and sensitivities
Several values shape jewish prayer for the sick and dying:
- Dignity and consent: Always respect the person’s wishes. Ask whether they welcome prayer aloud, in silence, or at another time.
- Kavannah (intention): Pray with sincerity; the heart of prayer is focus and care, rather than perfect words.
- Pikuach nefesh (preserving life): Jewish law prioritises health. Prayer supports, but never replaces, medical care or practical help.
- Presence: Sometimes the quiet presence of a loved one, holding hands or sitting nearby, is itself a prayer.
- Community: Many healing prayers are communal. You have every right to ask your community or a clergy member to include your loved one in public prayers.
Above all, jewish prayer for the sick and dying should soften fear, uphold hope, and affirm the person’s worth, regardless of outcomes.
Key prayers in jewish prayer for the sick and dying
Mi Sheberach (Prayer for Healing)
The best-known Jewish healing prayer is the Mi Sheberach (“May the One who blessed…”). Traditionally recited during synagogue services, it can also be said at home or by a bedside. It asks for refu’ah shleimah—a complete healing of body and soul. You can use the person’s Hebrew name if known, or their common name. Many communities include a brief list of names each week.
A simple English version might be: “May the One who blessed our ancestors bless and strengthen [Name], granting a complete healing. May wisdom guide those who care for them, and may courage and comfort surround them.” For full texts and background, see resources like My Jewish Learning’s guide to the Mi Sheberach and Chabad’s collection of prayers for the sick, both of which offer clear explanations and variations you can adapt.
While the Mi Sheberach is central to jewish prayer for the sick and dying, remember that it is a prayer for healing, not a test of faith. It accompanies treatment, care, and human kindness.
Psalms (Tehillim) for healing and strength
Across centuries, Jews have turned to the Book of Psalms for comfort, resilience, and hope. Many people recite specific Psalms on behalf of the unwell—commonly Psalms 6, 20, 23, 27, 30, 41, 121, and 130. For instance, Psalm 23 (“The Lord is my shepherd…”) speaks of guidance through “the valley of the shadow of death,” while Psalm 121 (“I lift my eyes to the mountains…”) affirms that help comes from beyond us.
Reading a Psalm slowly, one line at a time, can steady breathing and attention. Transliteration or English is fine. In jewish prayer for the sick and dying, this steady rhythm is often as important as the words themselves.
Vidui (Compassionate Confessional) and the Shema
When someone is very unwell, they may wish to recite the Vidui—a gentle, optional end-of-life confession. Its purpose is not fear, but peace: to make space for forgiveness, love, and letting go. The Vidui can be shortened and adapted; even a quiet “Please forgive me” to loved ones and to oneself can be powerful. You can learn the background from sources such as the overview of Vidui and many rabbinic guides that present approachable versions.
The Shema (“Hear, O Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is One”) is also often said near the end of life. For some, it is comforting to add the Baruch Shem line (“Blessed be the Name of His glorious kingdom forever and ever”). In jewish prayer for the sick and dying, these declarations affirm identity, faith, and connection—offered only if the person welcomes them.
Other meaningful texts and practices at the bedside
- Short healing phrases: “Ana El Na, Refa Na La” (“Please, God, heal her now”)—a biblical plea (Numbers 12:13) adapted for any person.
- Sections of the Amidah: Some include “Refa’einu” (the healing blessing) in their personal prayers.
- Gentle song or niggun: A wordless melody can soothe when words are difficult.
- After death: “El Malei Rachamim” and Mourner’s Kaddish belong to mourning. They are not part of jewish prayer for the sick and dying but may follow in the days ahead.
How to say jewish prayer for the sick and dying: step-by-step
- Prepare the space: If possible, lower distractions. Ask the person how they prefer to pray—silently, aloud, or with music. Respect any limitations (e.g., pain, fatigue).
- Set intention (kavannah): Take a slow breath. You might say, “I’m here, and I care. May this moment bring ease.” Intention gives shape to jewish prayer for the sick and dying.
- Use the person’s name: If appropriate, include their Hebrew name and mother’s name. If unknown, their common name is perfectly fine.
- Choose a text: A Psalm, Mi Sheberach, the Shema, or a simple blessing in English. Keep it short and gentle.
- Go slowly: Pause between lines. Watch the person’s comfort. Adjust pace or stop if they tire.
- Include others if welcomed: Invite loved ones to add one sentence each—feelings, gratitude, or hopes.
- Close with warmth: “May you feel held and at ease.” A light touch, if consented to, can communicate solidarity.
- Follow up: Prayer can prompt practical support. Ask if there is a need you can meet (a glass of water, a call to a friend, help with logistics).
Practical considerations in hospitals and at home
In hospitals
Many hospitals have chaplaincy teams, often including a Jewish chaplain. They can help you navigate jewish prayer for the sick and dying within clinical settings, advise on visiting, and liaise with staff. If the patient is sedated or non-verbal, chaplains can guide you in silent or brief spoken prayers near the bedside.
Electronic devices on Shabbat or festivals need sensitivity, but Jewish law traditionally makes room for care and connection in medical contexts. If in doubt, ask a rabbi or chaplain for practical advice. Keep any ritual items simple, and clear with staff before bringing them in.
At home or in hospice
At home, you can create a calm corner with a candle (observe safety), a favourite photo, or a small book of Psalms. In hospice care, many teams are experienced in supporting jewish prayer for the sick and dying and will help you find quiet time and space. Coordinating with the care team ensures that prayer fits the person’s daily rhythms and comfort.
Common mistakes to avoid in jewish prayer for the sick and dying
- Waiting too long to offer Vidui: It is better to offer it gently while the person still has the strength to choose.
- Pressuring or correcting: Prayer should comfort, not test knowledge or impose beliefs.
- Confusing mourning prayers with bedside prayers: Kaddish is for after death; focus first on healing, strength, and peace.
- Using complicated language: Plain English is welcome. God understands simple, sincere words.
- Ignoring the person’s energy: Keep prayers short; stop if fatigue or pain increases.
- Forgetting carers: Include a line for those providing care—professionals and family alike.
- Neglecting practical help: Pair prayer with action—phone calls, meals, or errands.
Examples of gentle words and blessings
Here are short, respectful phrases you can adapt. They work well alongside jewish prayer for the sick and dying or on their own when the moment calls for quiet support.
- “May you feel comfort, courage, and a circle of love around you.”
- “May the Holy One bring you strength of body and calm of spirit.”
- “We are here with you. You are not alone.”
- “May wisdom guide your carers, and may each breath be eased.”
- For carers: “May you be sustained in this sacred work, and may you find rest.”
When to contact a rabbi or chaplain
You may wish to contact a rabbi or Jewish chaplain if the person asks for clergy; if you want help with Vidui, the Shema, or other rituals; if you need guidance about jewish prayer for the sick and dying on Shabbat or festivals; or if the family would appreciate community support. Clergy can also help when the person is uncertain about prayer, offering options without pressure. If you are not connected to a synagogue, the hospital chaplaincy, local Jewish community organisations, or national networks can often recommend someone.
Recommended external resources
- My Jewish Learning: Mi Sheberach (prayer for healing) – background, text, and variations for praying for the ill.
- Chabad: Prayers for the Sick – a selection of traditional prayers and guidance.
- Wikipedia: Vidui (Judaism) – overview of the confessional prayer used at end of life and on Yom Kippur.
- NHS: End of life care – practical information on care options and support in the UK.
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Frequently asked questions about jewish prayer for the sick and dying
Can I say jewish prayer for the sick and dying in English?
Yes. Intention matters most. You can use translations, a simple English paraphrase, or your own heartfelt words. If you wish, add a few Hebrew words (like “refu’ah shleimah” for complete healing), but it is not required.
What if the person is not religious or prefers silence?
Always respect the person’s wishes. You might offer silent prayer, a moment of shared breathing, or simply say, “I’m holding you in my heart.” Compassionate presence is a core expression of jewish prayer for the sick and dying.
Do I need a rabbi to recite Mi Sheberach or Vidui?
No. Anyone may say these prayers. A rabbi or chaplain can help with wording, timing, and pastoral care, but you are fully empowered to pray on your own or with family.
Which Psalms are most commonly used?
Popular choices include Psalms 6, 20, 23, 27, 30, 41, 121, and 130. Choose one that speaks to you and the person you are supporting. Reading slowly and gently is often more important than covering many verses.
When should we offer Vidui?
Vidui can be said whenever someone feels vulnerable or wishes to find spiritual peace—not only at the last moment. It is optional and can be adapted to the person’s comfort and beliefs.
How do we include the person’s name in prayer?
Traditionally, you use the person’s Hebrew name and their mother’s name (for example, “Leah bat Chaya”). If that is unknown, their everyday name is perfectly fine. Clarity and care are what matter.
Conclusion on jewish prayer for the sick and dying
At its heart, jewish prayer for the sick and dying is about presence, kindness, and hope. From healing prayers like the Mi Sheberach to the steady comfort of Psalms and the gentle honesty of Vidui, these traditions offer words that hold us when life feels fragile. You can say them in English or Hebrew, alone or with community, in hospital or at home.
When you are unsure what to do, keep it simple: breathe, ask permission, speak briefly, and remain attentive to the person’s needs. Draw on community, chaplaincy, and trusted resources for support. In all its forms, jewish prayer for the sick and dying affirms dignity, strengthens bonds of love, and reminds us that no one faces illness or the end of life without being held by care and compassion.
May your words—spoken or silent—bring comfort, courage, and a sense of being gently accompanied on the way.
